Anxiety Attack (Complete with Rant)

Okay, I admit it: I’m having an anxiety attack.

I was playing around in Movable Type and figured out that part of its “Upload File” function relies on the ImageMagick module. Fair enough: I started reading about ImageMagick in relation to PHP because that would be something I’d need to integrate into my TextStyleM system. In other words, I would want to take an image a user has uploaded and, like in MT, allow the user to resize that image proportionately to create a thumbnail. But 5 hours later, I’m no closer to understanding image creation with ImageMagick or PHP. In fact, I’m more confused than I was when I started because now I have all these strange bits of incomprehensible code floating around in my head.

I’m too far into the development of TextStyleM to throw in the towel. In fact, that’s the last thing I want to do. But this is a rather odd place for me to be. I mean …I’m an editor by trade, not a programmer! I understand English and French pretty well. But geekspeak, I must say, not only goes over my head, but also irritates the hell out of me.

I do have to wonder why I keep doing this, and why I still can’t imagine myself doing anything else at this point of my life. I think the answer might be that I feel such a thrill when I finally do figure something out and it works exactly as it’s supposed to work 100 percent of the time.

I’m also stubborn. I don’t want to back down from a challenge, even though that challenge was probably fit for a team of two or three people rather than a solo act like my own. Plus, like some people I know, I’m probably being too hard on myself.

{2} Thoughts on “Anxiety Attack (Complete with Rant)

  1. BTW, I think I may have found something useful to guide me through the image thing. Now that I’ve found it, I’m going to sleep on it…

  2. Your friendly neighbourhood mirror here:

    one uploaded image does not a website make. You have been working on this for far too long. This one obstacle does not erase all the other code you’ve written OR, I might add, all the other obstacles you’ve already overcome in putting this thing together.

    There. The trash heap has spoken.

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