Will I Ever Write Here Again?
Given I started this blog in late 2002, it’s probably not too far-fetched, considering how things moves fast on the Web, to start this entry with a long, long time ago…
A long, long time ago, I started this blog after considerable hesitation. I worried about many things, not least of which wondering if I had anything really worth putting “out there” for anyone and everyone to read. But further up my list of concerns was hearing about and reading for myself blogs that put so much out there that their writers were exposing themselves and making themselves vulnerable in so many ways, including personally and professionally. Today, with social networking sites like Facebook, it seems like many people, confident with these sites’ privacy settings, have set aside such concerns. However, I remember well, small business owner as I was back then, feeling the need to suppress so much at the risk of disclosing stuff that would cause much malaise between my clients and me.
Today, as I mark my 44th birthday, these concerns have arisen again but for entirely different reasons. I will certainly write again, but here? I’m not so sure. It wouldn’t be fair if, at the same time, I wish to remain wide-opened and candid. Moreover, I think my motives for writing would be suspect. And quickly old and boring.
Right now, I can’t help recalling again, as I did in my very first blog entry, the closing paragraph of Margaret Laurence’s A Jest of God:
Where I’m going, anything may happen. Nothing may happen… I will be light and straight as any feather. The wind will bear me and I will drift and settle, and drift and settle. . . . God’s mercy on reluctant jesters. God’s grace on fools. God’s pity on God.
And so it may be.