Disconnected Ideas

  • It’s a beautiful, mild, sunny late-summer day, just like it was 10 years ago.
  • This is also the last Sunday of Aires Libres, when Rue Sainte-Catherine from Rue Berri to Avenue Papineau through the Village is closed off to traffic. Some restaurants have already begun removing their terraces; traffic will resume on Tuesday. It would be nice if this would continue into early autumn, but with evenings like last night becoming quite cool already, I suppose it’s time to accept that it’s over for another year.
  • I had brunch at Lafayette early today. At a table not too far from me were three guys, two of whom were married to each other. Both were extremely handsome; both exuded quiet contentment. No, I wasn’t jealous; maybe I was a tiny bit envious. There was a kind of warmth and ease between them that I suspect never existed or was never so visible between NowEx and me, and that made me feel a tinge of sadness. At the same time, I’m torn because I don’t see myself settling with someone. It’s not that I think I couldn’t; it’s that I’m not convinced that it would make me happy.
  • Tomorrow I have an appointment with Gary in the morning and the one for Junior in the afternoon. Aside from an appointment with Lucy late Thursday afternoon, I have no other commitment this week — just a lot of stuff to get done.
  • I finally met up with Cleopatrick for coffee last night. I guess we’ve both been preoccupied with life.
  • I keep getting a thought over and over these days — more so than usual: Thank god I’m in Montréal! I am SO in the place I need to be right now! And I say this despite recognizing that I’m a bit lonely, that I don’t know very may people in this city after more than three years. But then, the first 15 months or so were one kind of fog, and the last nine to twelve months have been another kind of fog. I emerged from the first and I’m only now slowly emerging from the second. However, I’m not so sure I would be able to if I were not in this city.