I don’t know about you, but when there’s two bits of news — one good, one bad — I prefer hearing the bad news first.
Bad News: On Tuesday, January 21, 2003, I fell off the wagon. I had 4 smokes. But I enjoyed them. No point feeling guilty.
Good News: I’m considering this a setback and I’m not giving up on quitting. In fact, I plan to resume my attempt; I don’t feel that 4 lousy smokes has set me back to Square One.
They say I should be looking at what caused me to fall off the wagon so that I can prevent it from happening again. One factor over which I have no control is the extreme deep freeze outside, but it’s depressing the shit out of me because it seems like there are so many months of it still ahead. Another factor is that maybe it’s a very bad idea for me to have a tiny reserve of smokes for when the going gets too tough. And finally, I’m seeing the strong correlation between concentration and smoking.
Okay fine! It’s not over ’til the fat lady sings. As far as I’m concerned, today was only a bad day.