Only the Second Post of 2007

Wow! And I’m not exclaiming in response to the new Windows Vista. Rather, I realized this morning when I got up that I haven’t even thought about blogging for a full month. Once a week — either Saturday or Sunday morning — I catch up on reading the blogs on my list, but that’s about it for me and blogs these days. But this situation is not that I lost interest in blogs and blogging as much as it’s a case of my being overwhelmingly consumed by work.

In theory at least, the contract for my day job ends in about six weeks and, again in theory, the project to which I’ve been assigned ended this week. Yet I was still expected to produce by last Wednesday this mind-boggling corporate management document in which I’m to set my goals for 2007 in terms of the project to which I’ve been assigned, which technically ended the same day the document was due. I did as I was told, but it drove me mad to spend so much time producing a document that would become obsolete the minute I submitted it. The rationale I was given is that the document would “only” have to be adjusted should I be extended or reassigned.

Even though I said to myself when I started the day job that I wasn’t to think of it as being more than a one-year contract, I can’t deny that I’m starting to stress over the thought of my term coming to an end. And it doesn’t help that one of my colleagues, whose contract technically ended last Wednesday, was never told whether or not she was extended; she merely reported to work on Thursday to find that she hadn’t been cut off and thus was expected to carry on. Also, in the last month, I’ve been taking on work from another (although closely related) section and consequently have had one of my most productive months. While doing so has demonstrated that I’m willing and able to help out my colleagues, I’m fully aware that I’m pretty low in the seniority hierarchy and among the first slated to go if it’s found there’s not enough work.

Meanwhile, there’s my business. It has occupied all the rest of my time — evenings and weekends — except the few stretches of time when I was awake but too exhausted to contemplate doing anything other than mindlessly watching American Idol or an episode of Law & Order. I’ve had no social life and, worse, no great desire to have a social life. I also knew that’s how it would be when I signed up for the day job and opted to keep running the business on a part-time basis, and doing so has accomplished what I set out: getting out of debt. But now there’s that lingering “but”…

This week I came to the unequivocal conclusion that I’m “into” my day job, although not because of some great love for the corporation I serve. Rather, it’s because it suits my temperament: I get to work where I’m most comfortable (i.e., at home), and each client I contact gives me an opportunity to solve a puzzle. So while I might not go so far as saying that I love my day job, I would say that I like it very much. However, whenever I delve back into my business, I realize that’s where my true passion resides. And I think that’s because I’m at the helm there, albeit not as frequently these days as I might want to be. Solving those puzzles gives me an even greater sense of satisfaction and accomplishment.

But you’re probably bored to tears reading about this (if you’ve even read this far), so I’ll just end this post here.

{1} Thought on “Only the Second Post of 2007

  1. Sorry to hear about the stress of potentially transitory jobs and the lack of communication. That’s not very fair to you guys. But hey, when does the corporate world ever been fair.

    Just thought I’d pop by and say hi. I’m starting to come back to life after a very very difficult year.


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